bedroom

I have been dreaming about decorating a little girl’s room for some time now…18 years to be exact. When I was pregnant with my first child, we didn’t know the gender of the baby. We chose a neutral Noah’s Ark bedroom set to put on our baby registry. Our baby girl seemed to be delighted with her bedroom. This also worked for our next baby, a boy who was born 18 months later. Areli and Cole shared a room and the animals in muted colors worked great for them.

However, when Areli turned three she became a big girl almost overnight. She was totally potty-trained and moved into a big bed. As I searched for the perfect comforter set, I began to dream of decorating a room for her. Perhaps soon we would move to a bigger home and Areli could have her own room, a GIRL’S room!

I found a lovely comforter and sheet set called, “Mariposa.” It had butterflies on a purple and yellow back ground. For the next few years I played with decorating ideas. I would paint imaginary walls in my mind, first bright yellow, then lavender. I would experiment with different colors of curtains. I decided that I would frame the adorable Anne Geddes baby butterflies in white frames and put them up all over the walls. The most beautiful little girl’s room began to take shape, and I was so proud of myself. Areli was going to be thrilled!

The years passed and we never did get a home big enough to give Areli her own room. We never had the time or money to paint walls and decorate, and then we rented for several years. Boring white walls became the norm for us.

Finally we moved into our own home and Areli got the largest bedroom…to share with two brothers. Eventually the brothers moved out and a sister moved in. There was even a baby in there a few times. Yet we never seemed able to patch the cracking walls and paint over the dull and faded yellow.

I still held on to my dream of a purple and yellow room for Areli. However, Areli was now growing up and developing her own dreams. I realized that purple, yellow, and butterflies had nothing to do with her dreams. She preferred green, blue, horses, football, and photography. She had developed tastes that were totally different from mine! How did this happen?

This is all that is left of my dreams.

A picture that is being stored in the attic and faded old sheets that used to be purple.

This year Areli turned 18. She has grown into a beautiful and capable young woman. She is so very like me, yet so totally different.

She has different tastes in books, movies, clothes, and interior decorating. She still loves green and blue and football and photography. She helps so much around our home. She loves and serves her family everyday with grace and endurance.

It was finally time for a bedroom makeover – ARELI STYLE!

Chris had a week off of work right around Areli’s 18^th birthday. He spent much of it fixing her walls, painting, and hanging window treatments and decorations.

Areli picked the color “Electric Lime.” When I saw it on the wall for the first time I thought, “Oh my! Was that really what Areli wanted?”

SHE LOVES IT! Her dream had become a reality! Now she has the perfect girl’s room in which to do her school work, hang out, and rest. She still has to share it with a younger sister, but I think she feels like it is finally truly a room for HER, designed by her.

Areli graduates from High School in less than two weeks. She has worked ahead and has already finished all of her classes with straight As. She is going to work on her photography over the summer and get a job in the fall. Her plan is to attend a Discipleship Training School with Youth With a Mission the following year. I am excited for her! The sky is the limit and the possibilities are endless. With all the missions organizations all over the world, she could do anything and go anywhere. Her future potential is boundless!

However, all this is very sad for a mom. When I think about my home without Areli in it, I just want to cry. How will I make it without her? She helps me so much with all the household duties and taking care of the younger children. More importantly, she is a wonderful friend, an oasis of womanly wisdom in a sea of boys. She is the person who always understands me. She is my companion when Chris is working long hours.

The other day I had a precious hour of free time before bed. I decided to spend it connecting with God, sitting on the love-seat in my bedroom. I was going to read and pray and write in my journal. When I entered, I found Areli sitting on my love seat, reading a book that I had always loved, and taking notes in her journal. I felt my heart swell with joy as I realized something. Areli had fully absorbed all I have tried to teach her. She has heeded my instruction, and she has also watched my life and followed my example. She has taken ownership of her faith and she deliberately seeks out truth. She has worked to learn and remember what is important.

She is so much like me yet so different from me…and so much better. My ceiling is her foundation. She is strong and mature…and almost ready to fly.

I want to whoop and holler in excitement for Areli…the successful efforts of my mothering! I want to curl up in a ball and sob for the same reason…for the beautiful “Electric Lime” room that will soon be half-way empty and for the vacant place in my heart.

I am so glad that we finally gave Areli that bedroom makeover that I had always been planning…even if it did take 18 years. Secretly I am hoping it might help her to stay a little longer, and beckon her to return to this safe haven again and again and again.

I don’t think my children understand what “interior decorating” means.

I love to daydream about rooms in my house that I will remake into works of art. I enjoy looking at pictures in magazines and collecting ideas from TV shows and friends houses. I dream about getting yards and yards of inexpensive fabric at the PA Fabric Outlet for future curtains. I create floor plans in my mind, full of colors and patterns. When I think about decorating my bedroom, I think about fresh, light blue paint on the walls and a beautiful blue and white quilt for the bed.

I used to have daydreams for my children’s rooms as well. Areli’s room was going have purple bedding and yellow walls featuring lovely framed photos of Anne Geddes baby butterflies. Twelve years have passed since those dreams, and Areli no longer wants purple and butterflies.

Cooper and Calvin share a bright red bunk bed which matches nicely with their area rug of bright red, blues, and greens. Their walls still sport the pastel yellow, mint, and pink colors that were painted by the previous owner for their little girl. It doesn’t bother me too much because in my mind, their walls are the perfect shade of blue. At least we removed the sparkly chandelier.

Nine months ago we created a fifth bedroom in our home for the baby, and I have filled up a file cabinet in my brain with ideas for his room consisting of a many shades of orange and a lot of lions. The walls of his room are still stark and messy white, all patched with putty, waiting to be sanded and painted a warm yellowish, orangey, brown/tan color. The actual official color has yet to be researched and determined. Something like Sherwin Williams’ “Delicious Melon.”

Will my interior decorating dreams ever come to pass? I am still hopeful, although I have not yet been able to do any of the children’s rooms in my 15 years of being a mom. Just for fun and so I could more accurately daydream about decorating their rooms, I posed the question to each child.

“What if you had your own room and you could decorate it any way you wanted to?”

The answers amazed and inspired me, but I realized that they don’t think about decorating in the same way I do. Not by a long shot! The answers ranged from:

“Camouflage loft bed with green walls and a huge closet that locks so no one can touch my stuff.”

“A wall covered with books shelves and books, my own laptop with editing software, new and better cameras.”

“Entertainment center with flat screen TV and game system that flips around to become a dresser with all my clothes inside, blue walls, black ceiling with lights shaped like stars.”

I explained that none of their bedrooms would ever contain a TV or a game system as long as they lived with me, but that did not deter them.

“Flat screen TV, many game systems, and a slide that goes out my window. It will be a water slide but I can shut the water off, and then it will just be a regular slide…Oh, and I want a pool in my room.”

“A bed that comes out of the wall by itself and a pool and a hot tub and a slide and…” This answer was given by Calvin, my talkative 5-year old.

He continued to expound on the details of his dream room for the next 20 minutes. I must admit that my mind kept wandering in and out of the conversation. I caught fragments of his chattering.

“…the toilet will flush by itself….the lava wont hurt me…there will be crazy glue but I wont die…there will be extra feet to put on if you want to be taller…” and on and on it went.

Although I could not make sense of it all, one thing became abundantly clear to me. My definition of “interior decorating” had become much too narrow. What had happened to my big, hairy, audacious dreams? Children seem to be able to tell you exactly what they want, whether or not it is realistic …or even real. And they are not deterred by restrictions and rules. They think out of the box. Or perhaps their boxes are much more vast and exciting than my box. Those boxes become smaller and smaller as the child gets older, I have noticed. But isn’t it impossible, child-like faith that has given birth to solutions and inventions never previously considered?

I pray we can all grab onto that child-like hoping and imagining. Even if it never comes to pass the way we envision it, it sure is a lot of fun! And I pray that my children can hold on to their interior decorating dreams. I would love a house with slides and toilets that flush by themselves!